Tag Archives: nesting

a new normal

I’ve not exactly avoided coming here, though there hasn’t been much to say.

In October, Graham and I were both tested, and aside from a small fibroid on my uterus, everything seems to be good. My egg reserves were apparently “unusually good” for a person my age, and the doctor thought that the main thing that was wrong was our age. So I flew home early from Thanksgiving to begin the IUI process. The first month I had follicles that were 18, 15 and 11 mm. I didn’t get pregnant. The second month, I had a cyst on one of my ovaries and we skipped. The third month, I had follicles that were 26 and 24 mm. I didn’t get pregnant. And the fourth month was just weird.

We’re in the 5th month now, and we’re skipping the cycle. My doctor still thinks that everything looks good from the technical side of things. He just thinks my body is waiting for the perfect egg, and with my age, they’re not as common as they used to be. He still thinks the IUI will work, and Graham and I have talked about how far we’re willing to take this. I think two more cycles and then we start talking about what else.

The rest of my life seems to be coming together better now.

I just finished a 40 days of yoga experiment at a local studio, and I think I’m going to stick with it. Graham and I are in the planning stages of the house expansion, and we’re getting closer and closer to construction. We went to Taos for a week last month, and I think it invigorated both of us to get moving on projects. I feel more connected to myself than I have since I lost the pregnancy, and I think I care a lot more now. 2013 was a very stressful year for me, and I think it took all of 2014 to recover.

I feel like writing again. I feel like doing projects again. I feel like exercising again. I’m watching what I eat again.  Everything is not perfect, but I feel a lot better about things.  And maybe that’s the key.

Sleeping dogs lie

Fusilli and Celosa are asleep as I’m writing this. Graham is working. It’s raining and has been for a long time. This was surprise storm, and a welcome one. We’ve needed the rain.

I spent a good hunk of the morning working in the yard, pulling stuff out from under the palm tree and trimming vines that are creeping over the fence.  It wasn’t hard, but it was time consuming and laborious.  I took it easy, limiting myself to two hours total. But it was necessary.  And I have a little more to do tomorrow.

Afterwards, I cancelled a yoga appointment, and Graham and I went to lunch and then to Marshalls to check out some of the baby stuff there. We walked away with three onesies. Terribly cute.

I’ve been nesting a little today, too. I purged part of my closet and drawers.  Some stuff, like the workout gear for high intensity workouts and skinny jeans, went upstairs to the attic for retrieval later.  Other stuff I just got rid of.  If it fit, but I just don’t wear it, I tossed it.  There’s enough room in the closet now for a shelf for the baby. Graham and I are storing the things we buy there now.  Over time, I’m sure we’ll make more room. But for now, a shelf is a big deal.  I have a dresser in the attic that will be for the baby, and my old bed is at the ranch.

Right now, the plan is that the baby will sleep in our room for the first few months.  If we’re able to do the expansion next spring, then the baby will move to the nursery (which will either be our room now, or a room that is built in the expansion, depending on how the expansion goes).  If not, we’ll rearrange the house so the living part is on one side and the sleeping is on the other.  Hopefully, we can do the expansion.

Last night, we went to Barnes and Noble and bought a few baby books. We got the What to Expect…. and another one called Expecting 411 that is a little more casual. I’m reading that one tonight.

It’s not yet 9:30 and I’m already getting exhausted.  I knew that this would likely happen today, since I worked a lot this morning on the garden stuff.  It’s just always surprising how very quickly it hits me.  I’m going to try to hold out for 10:30, but I’m not sure that I’ll make it.